Lord Spoonfield III




4 5 3 6 9 9 10



Tag Skills

Small Guns: 80
Melee Weapons: 70
Energy Weapons 80


10 times the player level

Hit Points



Quest Leader


Spoonfield Manor


Holy Bacon!
The Brothers Spoonfield
The M60
The Final Piece
To kill a Werewolf
For Queen and Country


Father: Lord Spoonfield II
Mother: Lady Spoonfield
Brother: Matthew Spoonfield


Lord Spoonfield was born into great riches, and never had to face the hardships of the wastes. Looking out of the great windows of Spoonfield Manor, he observed the desolation, and at that point, decided to help people. He went on a small expedition out into the wasteland, and gave money and medical supplies to the local settlements. Earning him their trust.

Spoonfield is now one of the leading scientific minds in (What is left of) Great Britain. His privileged upbringing meant he could build a massive underground laboratory underneath 'Spoonfield Manor'. Blessed by a high Intelligence, and extremely good luck, he has almost completed the recipe for the creation of the most rare and prized thing in the former Kingdom of Great Britain, Cheese. Requiring only a final few ingredients, his work is almost complete. Anyone that has ever shot at him misses, and end up with a bullet lodged in their skull. His bodyguard, one Billy Mays, is the toughest combatant in the wastes, so basically, don't mess, with the Spoonfield.


  • Cross him, and you die.


  • "Let's not delay. I have an assignment for you, Nitpicker should have more details."
  • "Care for some Ostend soup?"
  • "What the... what the fuck is that?!"
  • "Ahhh. The wonders of science."
  • "I do not wish to concern myself with petty matters such as that."
  • "By the way, don't pester the scientists. They'll taser you."
  • "Some people have asked why I wear a Suit in gunfights. The fact is that it's comfortable, and, Ha, most people don't get the opportunity to shoot back."
  • "Tea, hmm?"
  • "Oho! Thought you could best me? Goodbye, you idiot."

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